I have been thinking lately- I know, a very, very dangerous thing to do!
With school starting, I have received the usual notices and entreaties - drive for school trips, attend meetings, help out in the classroom, help with hot lunch, and so on and so on.
The only problem with all of these requests, is that they require you be there during the school day - which coincides with my work day.
So how do I handle this - shall I feel guilty? Do I use my vacation days for these events? But if I use up my holiday days on these events what time will I have to take during summer vacation? And that would mean that Phil and Brian would go away with out me!
This is the dilemna of all working mothers. When you drop off the kid at the school, you feel like the mom's that are staying to help, are looking at you and talking trash because you never help out at the school. But if you dont got to work - there would not be any money to pay for the school trips, hot lunches, book fair books or any other things, like rent and food!
It is not like this is something new for me - I have been a working mom for a long time. It just that there seems to be more demands/requests than ever.
I have decided that I will not feel guilty for working, I will not feel guilty for not being at the school. I will continue to be an involved parent, assisting with homework if needed, helping find books for research, driving to music lessons, getting the child involved in other extra curricular activities as they present themselves.
I will continue to say "not available" when the school asks for parent drivers. I will offer to help with bus rentals when needed. I will continue to support the school fundraisers. I will feel good about being a working mom and contributing to the family.
And that is my rant for today!
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2 comments:
See you are helping...and you deserve many kudos for being a working mom, it's tough!!
I am fortunate that I get to stay home (for now)but I too cannot be of help when the volunteer flyers come home, because I have other children so, alas, I choose to help where I can and ignore the guilt :)
I thought for sure I had commented here that I feel guilty for not being about to help out where I think I can. I often see the "come and help count the money for hot lunch" note and think that would be an okay way to help because it's pretty fast but then I picture myself telling the kids "no" which IMHO makes me feel even more guilty...This year I will be available to help out but only on Monday's and Wednesdays from 1-3 and most of the vollenteer stuff happens in the AM...oh well...
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